Feeling It

One of my favorite college courses I've taken has been "Educational Psychology." I loved the professor, I loved the subject matter, and I loved my public school placement. I loved it so much, in fact, that I took another course in the education department, just for fun, which led to a few more courses in the education department... which led to a minor in education (little known fact about me)!

Perhaps my favorite part about the educational psychology course, however, was the fact that we did not have any due dates for our coursework. Don't get me wrong: we had weekly homework assignments: readings, papers, summaries, worksheets, etc... but they did not have to be turned in until the very last day of the semester. Talk about some educational psychology! I discovered that I actually enjoyed ("enjoyed" is up for interpretation) doing my homework each week when I didn't feel like I had to do it. And the weeks where I just wasn't feeling it? I could simply put it off until a time where I did feel like doing it, whether that was the following day, the next week, or the final days of the semester ;)

All that to say... I just haven't been "feeling it" lately when it comes to blog writing, so I keep putting it off. Blog writing is significantly better when one is "feeling it." Trust me, you can't force creativity. I've been in a bit of a funk: job searching, trying to finish up with classes so I can graduate and get out of here, hating the whole "long distance" thing more and more each day. However, I know good & well that the most wonderful cure for a funk is an extended weekend at Camp Bethel...which is exactly where I spent the past three days :)

Reading Thoreau's Walden Pond while spending the weekend at Camp Bethel? It's pretty good for a funk, too :)

I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived... I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life.

We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake... by an infinite expectation of the dawn, which does not forsake us in our soundest sleep. I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by a conscious endeavor.

It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of arts.
[all excerpted from Chapter 2: Where I Lived, and What I Lived for]

I love this picture: a self-portrait taken in the window of the Craft House :)

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Amidst my camp wanderings, I discovered that the shaky bridge is being rebuilt. I spent countless summer nights in high school on the original bridge, talking into the wee hours of the morning with my closest friends about where I should go to college, who I should date, what I wanted my life to be like. We shared our hopes and dreams and fears in this exact spot: a simple wooden pedestrian bridge that shook violently (hence the "shaky bridge" title) under the weight of a dozen simultaneously-jumping campers who never seemed to be frightened by its rickety structure. A year ago, however, a flash flood tore through the creek, absolutely destroying the bridge in the process.

It remained untouched for almost a year: wooden planks and debris strewn throughout the dry creek bed, campers forced to wake up an extra 47 seconds earlier to walk to the main bridge in order to arrive at morning watch on time all summer :) But now? Slowly, yet surely, it's being rebuilt... and it looks much less "shaky" this time around. There's a metaphor in all of that somewhere, I'm sure of it. However, it's getting late, so I'll let you figure that one out for yourself :)

The "new" shaky bridge & Saturday evening worship at Camp Bethel via Instagram. [My username is @simplybeffie if you want to follow the feed.]

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One cannot stay on the summit forever, so after a wonderful weekend away, it's now back to exerting every last bit of my energy into the remaining five weeks and two days of final papers and projects. (I think I can, I think I can...) As far as "feeling it" goes, I've learned that sometimes the best solution to getting out of a funk is to start writing anyway, regardless of if you feel it or not. While it's a bit of a struggle to get the ball rolling... it feels nice to be back. I'm making no promises for ultra-frequent blog posts, but I promise to not disappear for weeks at a time again :)

PS: Happy first day of Spring! :)