My Moto Military Weekend, Part II

I posted Part I of my "moto military weekend" yesterday -- if you missed it, you can check it out here.

And if you haven't figured out what "moto" means, you can check it out here.

Moving along...

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You have friends with T-shirts like this:

...and even more friends who could proudly wear the same T-shirt.

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You drive past buildings on base with the grim reaper painted on the side.

Zach's current unit: 1st Battalion, 9th Marines: The Walking Dead. How's that for moto?

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You (successfully!) attempt to fit inside your Marine's seabag and he proceeds to carry you around on his back.

You're really no longer in civilian world when...

You browse through the clothing section at the PX and look across the aisle to see this:

Oh, heyyy.

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You notice that People magazine has been replaced with the Marine Corps Times at the checkout counters.

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You have dozens of photos that you're not allowed to share because you weren't actually authorized to take them. My bad, Lejeune. Post some signs in the area or something, because it's super cool looking and there's no way I was the first person to snap some pics.

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You park next to this, period.

You're no longer in civilian world when...

Even the drink machines are moto. I like what I see, Mr. Blue Digital Camo with your EGA.

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You spend your Sunday afternoon as the sole female in a military barber shop surrounded by at least 50 Marines getting their weekly "high and tights" and "medium regs." This is easily my favorite tradition when I visit Zach on base. Words can't do it justice, so I'm not even going to try.

And lastly, you're no longer in civilian world when...

You pass this window display at the mall.

I told you... it's a completely different world.

• • • • •

Keep it classy, J-Vegas. Until next time...

My Moto Military Weekend

^^Please note the awesome shirt that I bought at the PX. I'm aware you can't actually read the fine print, but says "Mission Ready. Ooh-Rah USMC. Semper Fi. The Strength of the Corps." Some motivator couldn't decide which slogan to put on the shirt, so he just threw 'em all on there. I think it's hysterical. Tun Tavern, baby.


I don't get to visit Zach at Camp Lejeune often, but I absolutely love the time that I do spend down there. Don't get me wrong: I'm glad that we won't be living in Jacksonville after we're married -- my only graphic design opportunity would be at a tattoo shop. (However, considering those are more abundant than restaurants in the area, it might not be a bad gig...) Regardless, I love it. Being on base is like being transported to a completely different world.

Allow me to explain:

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You have attended multiple Marine Corps Mandatory Fun Days.

I have never met a Marine who enjoys Mandatory Fun Day, ever. But the Marine Corps keeps on having them, and we keep on going (because it's mandatory, obviously). Sometimes they aren't so bad, like cookouts on the beach. But this one? This Mandatory Fun Day had llamas and clowns and balloons. Someone please tell me where the fun is in that.

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You witness a group of Marines enter a rapidly deflating bounce house to rescue children like a flippin' SWAT team on a mission. I kid you not: the generator stopped working and with one giant "whooosh," the inflatable castle collapsed. I yelled, "man down!" (it was the first thing that came to mind?) and these boys took off into the bounce house, swooped up children under both arms, and rushed them safely outside before the kids even realized what was going on. I would have taken pictures, but the mission was complete before I could even get my lens cap off. Folks, I've never laughed so hard in my life; nothing like a little bounce house SWAT team to put the fun in Mandatory Fun Day.

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You take photos on the beach in the ugliest sweatshirt known to mankind: the official government-issued Marine Corps PT sweatshirt (in olive drab green, of course). Goodness, I love that hideous thing.

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You can walk for miles and miles on uninhabited beach. Okay, I'm sure that exists in civilian world, too... but still. It's so bizarre going to the beach on base and not seeing a single hotel or beach house. Or even a single person, for that matter. This is Zach's backyard, people:

You're no longer in civilian world when...

A couple of Marines teach you how to shoot a gun on Second Amendment Lane (I can't make this stuff up. Second Amendment Lane, people. I learned how to shoot a gun on Second Amendment Lane).






Adam Hipp, ladies and gentlemen. (Also featured here and here). He has somehow become everybody's favorite guest star in my sitcom of a life. Plus he's in our wedding, so you're guaranteed to keep seeing more of him.

For the record, I did pretty well for my first time - 35/36 hit the target on this one.

(Please note Zach showing off 7/7 down in the bottom left...)

You're no longer in civilian world when...

You see this as you walk across the church parking lot on Sunday morning:

Goodness, It gets me every time. Rare moments like those make me wish I had been able to live in Jacksonville throughout Zach's time in the Marine Corps. Don't get me wrong - I have some of the greatest friends. But there's something about being surrounded by people on a daily basis who just GET IT. People who have lived it. People who know what it feels like and have experienced the spectrum of emotions that accompany military life. God bless you and your car window decor, women of First Baptist in Jacksonville.

• • • • •

I actually have quite a bit left, so I'll break this post up into two parts.

Until then, Mission Ready, Ooh-Rah USMC, Semper Fi, and The Strength of the Corps ;)

Coffee Date

If you were to come over for a coffee date, I'd probably hug you for an unnaturally long time before you ever stepped foot in the door, because I've returned to the less-than-pleasant time in my life where I only get hugs a few times a month. I'd tell you that I was tempted to go out and get a kitten yesterday to compensate for my lack of interaction with a living creature of any sorts after 4:30PM, but I have commitment issues when it comes to all things (apart from Zach, calm down), and I couldn't justify fourteen years with a cat in exchange for three months of not coming home to an empty apartment.



My cat back home. And I say "my cat" in the way that means "I begged for a pet when I was in elementary school & took exceptional care of her for the first six months of her life. Then she kinda became my mom's cat. Oops."

ps. This picture is from last spring. Fat Kitty has shed some weight since then. Mom says she's on a wedding diet. Meow.


I'd probably apologize for the awkward extended hug and invite you into my place. As I started heading to the kitchen to begin whipping up your espresso drink of choice (look at you being friends with a former barista!), we'd pass the living room, in which case you'd more than likely notice my giant L-shaped couch. I'd beam with pride and inform you that said furniture was my first super grown-up purchase. Because fewer things say "super grown-up" than an L-shaped couch.



I actually bought this the day after I moved into my apartment almost three months ago. But if someone purchases a couch and neglects to upload a photo to any type of social media outlet whatsoever, did they really get a new couch? Exactly.


The excitement surrounding grown-up purchase #1 would remind me about how stoked I am regarding grown-up purchase #2: a washer & dryer. My new appliances may not be L-shaped, but the world of economics dictates that they are an infinitely more "super grown-up" purchase than any couch. And by "super grown-up," I mean "expensive." Who knew?





At this point, I really would begin making coffee drinks... except you'd probably observe that the curtains have been replaced by strange drapings of paper chains made from an old English literature textbook. I'd tell you that a lot of household decor items (ie, curtains) found their way onto the wedding registry, and in the meantime, I have a wedding countdown chain draped around the window. I'm rather fond of it, actually.

True fact: 103 days until I'm marrying my best friend. I'd definitely mention that if you came over for a coffee date.

By now, I'd postpone all coffee-making until the conclusion of a tour of my first ever place. It wouldn't take long -- I promise -- as it would mostly consist of "This is where the (TV/desk/entertainment center/etc.) is going to go... once I get one." (Or once I find a way to get it here. Speaking of which, anyone with a truck planning to casually drive from Winston to Raleigh/Cary in the next three months?) The tour would also include "This is where my (insert like, 12 half-finished art canvases. I have a problem) are going to hang." Other tour highlights would feature: "This is my new bedding that I absolutely adore."


Yes, I did actually clear this with Zach before I bought it. He's incredibly easy-going... and lest you feel sorry for him, we're going to have a 20"x30" Boondock Saints canvas in our living room. Definitely didn't think that one through before I made it for his room in the barracks last year.


Once all the excitement of new apartments and super grown-up purchases began to wane, I really would make the coffee, and we'd go sit on the balcony. I'd undoubtedly take my camera, because after scrolling through the last few months of photos on my memory card, I've discovered that all I do is take pictures of the sky at night from my balcony. Eh, not sorry. It's pretty.

August 8 | July 6 | July 22

Then you would tell me all about your life, because if it were up to me, I would tell you that I watched 46 episodes of Friends last week. I would tell you that I also managed to overflow the dishwasher, melt candlewax all over the kitchen counter, and dive roll off the same kitchen counter... into the living room wall with my shoulder. And while we were at it, I would probably tell you that I bumped the thermostat down to a breezy 75 degrees before you came over, because I'm perhaps the most cold-natured human being ever and I typically keep it set on 80. True story. Fortunately, you would be telling me all about your life and I wouldn't say any of that, so you can keep on thinking that I'm way cooler than I really am.

And before you left, I would tell you that I am going to shoot a gun for the first time ever this weekend, so we should really do coffee next week when I'll have something more exciting to talk about.

Day #1500

I wish someone would have told me that the 5 weeks that Zach and I dated during summer camp 2008 would be the only opportunity I would have to hug him every day for an entire week before we got married four and a half years later.

If so, I probably wouldn't have been so strict about avoiding each other during the camp week ;)

But unfortunately, I had no idea. I had no idea that summer would end up being 2% of our dating relationship, with the remaining 98% that followed being long distance.

How crazy is that?

Apart from the very first five weeks of dating, Zach and I have never lived in the same city. We've never shared a zip code; we've never even shared an area code. We have spent some time living in the same state, but we've also spent a great deal of time living in separate states... and separate time zones/countries/hemispheres.







Because I'm a math geek at heart, I can tell you on any given day during the past 4+ years, the average number of miles that has separated us has been 1,147. I've kept track of the trips we have made to see each other during that time, and combined, we've driven over 37,000 miles: enough to completely circle the globe one and a half times.

And today is day #1500 of our long distance relationship.

1500 days. There should be some law against living hundreds or even thousands of miles apart from your best friend for that long.

But there's not, and it happened. And it's going to keep happening for the rest of this year. In the meantime, I thought about listing all the pros of a long distance relationship. For example, Friday night phone dates don't require make-up. And there are always the epic first kiss moments after time spent apart:

Boot Camp Graduation, Parris Island, April 2009 | Afghanistan Deployment Homecoming, Camp Lejeune, December 2011

...but I wouldn't be fooling anybody. There are infinitely more cons than pros. For every epic first kiss, there's a gut-wrenching good-bye. And I would not complain in the slightest if I had the chance to go on a real Friday night date that required make-up.

However, Zach and I made the decision quite some time ago to play the hand we were dealt, and if that included 1500+ days of being in a long distance relationship, then bring it on :) We each chased our dreams, his of becoming a Marine and mine of becoming a Duke graduate. I've discovered that our situation is incredibly rare: college students don't spend all four years in a long distance relationship; they're supposed to be out "enjoying college," whatever that entails. And enlisted Marines don't spend all four years in a long distance relationship; they're supposed to get married ASAP so they get paid more and don't have to live in the barracks (sad, but true).

Yet here we are, 1500 days later :)







I've learned quite a bit during my 1500 days of long distance dating. I'm not sure if absence really makes the heart grow fonder, but I do know that it's possible to reach a point where you're about as fond of one another as you could possibly be... and then absence just makes you crazy :) I know that the good-byes never get any easier. And I know that after all is said and done, I will never ever ever utter the phrase "oh, it's not that bad!" when talking to someone else in a long distance relationship.

My mom and I always laugh about those people. They ask "how far away is he?" or "how long has it been since you've seen him?" It doesn't matter what the answer is: "4 hours, 8 hours, it-doesn't-matter-how-many-hours-because-it's-physically-impossible-for-me-to-travel-to-where-he-is" or "3 months, 5 months, 7 months..." --- they instantly respond with "oh, that's not so bad!" I would love for someone to enlighten me as to what distance or amount of time would merit a "well, that sucks." I'm convinced I could tell someone that Zach and I were going to spend the next seven years without seeing each other once, and I'd still get a "oh, that's not so bad" in response. So consider this your friendly little PSA, blog world. I know that deep down, you want to make things better. But your "that's not so bad" is entirely not helpful. No one is in need of being consoled here, so just call it like it is.

So... I can check "be in a long distance relationship for 1500 days" off the bucket list. If I could go back in time, would I do it all again? Eh, probably... I kinda like the kid ;) But am I super grateful that I don't have to? Oh, for sure! I'm so incredibly glad that the number of days until Zach & I don't have to say good-bye any more are ticking away. In the meantime, I know you're about to leave some comment about how we're "so close!" and it's "almost over!"... so just use a little self-control & go re-read that friendly little PSA ;)

Friday's Letters

Linking up with Friday's Letters today :)

• • • • •

Dear Zach: Thanks for getting me the super adorable red North Carolina necklace (featured in the series finale of One Tree Hill) when we went exploring in Pittsboro. I want to wear it every day. Even when it totally doesn't match the rest of my outfit.

Dear Blog Readers: Don't be alarmed by the layout/design updates. We'll just call this a work in progress. As in, I've been doing some simple web design for friends recently & realized that I hadn't done much to update my own page in the past year. It will undoubtedly change another dozen times in the next month before I settle on something I like.


Dear Decker & Scham: I can't believe you've already deployed again to Kuwait. More so, I can't believe Zach would be in Kuwait with you right now if he had decided to re-enlist; it feels like y'all just got home from Afghanistan! Please be safe.


Dear Marine Corps: I don't like you for taking Zach's friends overseas, and I don't like you for rarely allowing me to spend a weekend with my fiancé. However, I am very much in love with the fact that the 1/9 Marine Corps Birthday Ball is on the Riverfront in Wilmington this year. I know it's two months away, but I have waited three years to attend another one of these... and I am stoked!


Dear Pumpkin-Flavored Anything: I have no idea when it became so cool to become obsessed with you, but I will find some other way to celebrate the unofficial start to the fall season (in the 88 degree weather, mind you). So over-rated.

• • • • •

You can find me on Instagram at @simplybeffie.

Happy weekend!

Wedding Wednesday

In no particular order, the myriad of wedding-related tasks we've accomplished over the past month:

• Engagement Pictures: I mentioned in the last "Wedding Wednesday" post that Zach and I had our engagement pictures taken... and now we have all the photos! I've included a few below that aren't posted on the photographer's blog, but if you wanna see many, many more, you should definitely click over & check 'em out!



We're so thrilled with all of them. Amanda Castle Photography is beyond fabulous, so Winston-Salem (& surrounding areas), snag her up while you still can!


• Final Dress Fitting: My dress almost fit perfectly as it was, but we still took it in slightly, just to be on the safe side :) I have also opted to not wear five-inch wedges on my wedding day, so we had it hemmed as well. (I'm tall, but I'm not that tall.) My dad was able to see me in my dress for the first time at the final fitting, which is good, since apparently my dress has to live at the bridal salon until a week before I need it. Um, what? I wanted to bring it home & casually wear it around my apartment...


• Wedding Website: Not gonna lie, this was the first thing I started working on after I got engaged in May... way before we had a venue, a bridal party, or even a date. What can I say? I love designing :) Anyway, I finally sat down & finished the thing last week, so you can get your full dose of wedding stalking at www.haynes-jones.com.







• Save the Dates: After designing my own graduation announcements back in the spring, my mom said I had a lot to live up to with my save the dates. No pressure or anything. Based on the feedback I received last week after I mailed them out, they apparently measured up :)

But I'll let you be the judge of that:

• Groomsmen Tuxes: check! I'm so glad this is a painless process. Zach has zero experience in the tux renting department, and I have very minimal (I accompanied one of my prom dates to get a tux in order to make sure that his vest matched my dress), so we weren't exactly sure what to expect. However, the guy that we worked with told Zach and I that the groomsmen just have to show up with a pair of underwear & everything else is provided: shirt, pants, vest, tie, coat, socks, shoes, cufflinks, and a variety of other accessories. God bless America.


• Wedding Bands: check! I mean, my wedding ring is lovely... but y'all, let's get real for a minute: Zacharie Jones was a five year old on Christmas morning after he picked out his wedding band. I have never seen anything so precious in my entire life. Apparently, he finds it rather unfair that he doesn't have anything to show the entire world that he's engaged (ie: an engagement ring), and he really wants the entire world to know that he's engaged. He has found some way to mention his wedding ring in every conversation we've had since we picked them out. He is also incredibly bummed that he can't wear the ring until the wedding.

• • • • •

We're becoming quite the pros at this wedding planning stuff. Today is officially the "halfway through our engagement" day, & I think we're definitely more than halfway through with getting this show on the road! :)